My B.F.F. is about to become a mama.
I’m a little “emo” tonight thinking about this and wishing I was able to be there for her and welcome her new little baby girl into the world in person. Tomorrow my friend Ashley will be induced and her life will change forever. The Ashley I’ve known since 7th grade will soon become an entirely different human being. A person whose heart will grow bigger, love will reach new levels and joy will overflow when she holds her brand new baby. Nothing I say will prepare her for the emotions that will flood both she and her husband.
To say I am excited for her is an understatement. She’s waited a long time for this and for whatever reason, the time is NOW. I’m a skeptical person by nature…but I KNOW without a doubt that she and her husband are ready for this new phase of life and they will be EXCELLENT parents.
So…Ashley…my friend…as a mommy of two I can only give you the advice I’ve learned along the way and pass these words of wisdom on to you on the eve of your induction. Take it or leave it, live by it or ignore it…it’s really up to you, because you after all, are about to become the mom to a tiny human and in the end, you’ll know what’s best for her.
1.) BREATHE…This time will be anxious, it will be nerve wracking and you will be DRAINED (and we all know how much you love your zzzzzz’s). Just remember, it goes SOOOOO fast so don’t wish the time away, even the hard times. I remember the only way Mason would nap was laying on top of me. I thought, “I’m NEVER going to get anything done.” Do you know what I would give now to hold him like that again for hours just watching him sleep?
2.) GRACE…give yourself a break, forgive yourself when you screw up and extend GRACE to your hubby. You won’t think Chris will do things as well as you with the baby and vice versa. You’ll keep score of who’s doing more. But! You’ll both do the best you can…and that’s all that matters. Be patient with yourself and him.
3.) YOUR MARRIAGE WILL CHANGE…you two were the centers of your own universe and now this baby girl will demand ALL of you for a VERY long time. That’s a wonderful thing in a way, but I’m here to tell you..it’s TOUGH on marriages. Even the strong ones! As mentioned before…you’re tired, you’ve run out of patience and your spouse will get the brunt of that. It’s unfair, but it will happen. At the end of the day, remind yourself that this is a phase of life that you’ll get through TOGETHER and in the end, it will be you and him ALONE again…so make sure you remember to still like each other along the way. My kids are 6 and 8 and I’m JUST starting to WANT to leave them with a sitter a couple times a month. Strange but true…you and Chris will WANT to hang out with your kid. It’s weird. lol
4.) YOU’RE GOING TO FEEL CRAZY….but just for awhile. These first few months you’re going to cry, freak out, throw tantrums and feel like Jack Nicholson in “The Shining.” Trust me…I get it. I didn’t care about anything or anyone for about a year. Seriously…at work I could give a rip if someone bought a blue sofa or a red one – normal things suddenly seemed very mundane to me. I mean c’mon! You just birthed a human for cryin’ out loud. You’re allowed to be hormonal, confused, tired and deranged for awhile. Have some wine…pump and dump…and move on.
5.) TEACH HER TO BE LIKE YOU…You’re one of my favorite people on the planet. From the moment I met you, I loved you. Teach her to be like you because you’re awesome. You’re full of joy, laughter and a light hearted spirit. I love that about you. You’re open minded, willing to listen and try anything! You’re loyal and fierce and have never wanted anything from me but my friendship. You’re a good friend Ashley…have I ever told you that? I can’t think of better traits than those to teach your baby girl.
Soooo…that’s all for now my love! I’m here when you need me Ash…my prayers and love are being sent across the country to you right now. I love you and I CAN’T WAIT to meet your new baby girl!
All my love to you and Chris…enjoy the ride!